One of my favorite people died this week. She was my former mother-in-law. I knew her for fifty years. After my divorce, we remained close. I visited her whenever I was in Detroit and spoke on the phone frequently. She was a listener. I recall her giving unsolicited advice once. My mother was dying and she was afraid I was taking on too many responsibilities. I explained why I made the choices I did and she supported me. She was devoted to my children and to her greatgrandchildren. Hearing about them were her favorite stories. We loved each other unconditionally.
I miss her.
Erik had a kidney stone and, at times, was in major pain. He told me he had his annual checkup with his primary care physician and asked if I would drive him lest he was taking a painkiller at the time. He did not want to drive. I took him, and, at the end of his appointment, his doctor came out and introduced himself to me. He thanked me for bringing Erik. I told him it had been years, but in the past, I had also taken Erik to medical appointments.
I am thrilled I am still available!
Erik came over for dinner the other night. Isaac and Ari are at camp and Ellen had a friend visiting unexpectedly. I had made a dessert I thought Ellen would like. I had a great time, as always, with Erik. It is meaningful to so fully enjoy my time with each of my kids. When he left, I gave him the pie to take home. When I spoke with him two days later, I mentioned that since the pie is frozen, he can keep it until the boys come home. He said that would not happen.
I tried guys.
My cousin came to visit. I have not seen her in a long time. My daughter-in-law went to Norway to visit family. The heightened awareness that can result from these times together enhance our lives. There is always the chance of a new revelation.
On Ari’s 11th birthday, he will be in three countries. He will be leaving France, transferring planes in Amsterdam, and ending in Norway. I told him I hope his family will learn to sing Happy Birthday in all three languages.
Let’s see what happens.
Had flowers delivered to my 101-year-old mother-in-law for Mother’s Day. I do this every year representing the whole family. When I spoke to her, she said she had not received them. I checked with the front desk at the nursing home and they combed the facility and found no flowers. It took three messages through their web site and three phone calls to arrange for another delivery of the flowers.
My time is valuable.
I value women who decide how they would like to celebrate Mother’s Day. Too many are concerned they are going to hurt someone’s feelings, i.e. their children or their own mother. Why is the priority, so often, to be more concerned about how others feel than about ourselves? I know one woman who does not join a huge family celebration because she prefers to spend the day by herself.
What would you truly like to do? I dare you.
Got a call from my daughter who works in Thousand Oaks. The area was evacuated due to a wild fire. There are thousands of employees where she works. She was stuck in the parking lot surrounded by black sky during daylight. No cars were moving. She was scared, so was I. She was low on gas. More to worry about.
It took her two hours to get home. The panic never ceases.
Went to two soccer games on Saturday for Isaac and Ari. The whole family decided to go out for lunch together. Isaac rode with Carrie and me. As we pulled into the restaurant parking lot, two cars were backing out. I waited for one and pulled into the space. As we got out of the car, Isaac and I both said, “One of us should stand in the other space so that Mommy and Daddy have a place to park.” Simultaneously, we said the same line.
Genetics. It is wonderful.
My dear friends Ken and Pauline invited me, Isaac and Ari over for dinner. They had sparkling cider for the boys, wine for us. We all drank out of wine glasses. During dinner, the conversation had a political theme at times and I wondered if the boys were bored. After dinner, Ken invited to boys to his music room. Ken is a wonderful guitarist. They went and Pauline and I chatted with a background of guitar music from upstairs. I later discovered that Isaac and Ari had played electric guitar and ukulele.
I was so appreciative that we each had an environment that was enriching and enjoyable.
It is nice to share our interests.